Friday, July 16, 2010

I was like a prodigy, but not.

I found something amazing. The first story I ever wrote. I'd have had to have been about six or so. It's fantastic. And terribly, terribly awful. It makes my life. It's called, "When the Shark Attacked," and as a special (in more ways than one) treat, I'm going to post it here.

Oh, and just so you know, I was a really really really really really bad speller. And I'm so not correcting any of it. Also, I thought that 12:00 PM was midnight. (I wasn't that smart, either.) Anyhoo, the story:

"It was a drak naith on The Ship. It was 12:00 PM. I saw a grav in The watter. I saw a whale. It was big. It was eating some fish. I was so homgre but I do not like fish. I did eat cookys. I love cookys. Then I saw a shak. The shark aet the ship. The End."

Personally, I'm a big fan of the plot twists. It starts out all moody; it's wicked dark and probably stormy, and we'd just sailed over an underwater graveyard complete with headstones, which you'd be able to see had you the illustrations I do. Then, suddenly, the mood shifts with the idea of cookies. But just when you think I'm going to enjoy my chocolatey treat, the entire boat gets eaten by a shark. I mean, that's some intense shit. Even Jaws could only eat one person at a time, and she didn't eat actual boats.

I haven't been able to beat that plot since.


  1. OMFG THIS IS S HILARIOUS!! officially my favorite story of all time! <3 <3 love you so much! I like cookys too! :D

  2. LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! can we get this printed at kinko's when we get back to b-town and hang it as a banner in 308?